Thoughts From The Road: Believe In Yourself

I meet a lot of people as I travel around the world. It’s one of the major draws for traveling around the world to me. I love meeting new people, I love developing connections with these people, and I love learning their stories. You could call me a collector of stories when it comes down to it. I always say the photographs I take and the stories I learn are probably the most valuable souvenirs I bring back with me from my travels. But through it all, other people usually want to understand just one thing about me.

Thoughts from The Road: Believe in Yourself - My Normal Gay LifeThe topic brought up more than any other topic is how I became a travel writer. Everyone is fascinated by my occupation and wants to understand how it’s possible I do what I do. I often have to address this. In fact, it happens so much that I have a basic script that I can repeat on command. Here’s usually what I tell everyone:

I started writing a blog about my life three years ago in an effort to illustrate the normalcy of being gay-married to the world. I realized I don’t really like writing about my day-to-day very much and the one aspect I love to write about is travel. Since travel is a major part of our life, I decided to focus on that. Over the course of two (almost three years now) I’ve slowly built up the blog and am trying to make a name for myself. It’s quite a fun job but sometimes it’s not as glorious as it appears. 

It Doesn’t Matter
Hanging out at Bathsheba Rock in Barbados

The thing about me is I really don’t care to talk about how I got my job or any of that.  I think the reason most people ask me about my work is because they would like to also pursue whatever dream they may have but it is rather intimidating and frightful. I mean, if I fail, I don’t really have anything. I always tell people I am a bit privileged in my adulthood circumstances. I went through most of life with nothing and I think some good choices I made, as well as an undying flame to prove myself, led me to where I currently am.

Nevertheless, I do understand why people find the subject so interesting. Sometimes I can’t really believe this is what I do with my life. I decided to ignore what society, friends, family, and everything else that influences us deems the appropriate path in life. It seems there is a right way to go about life and I’m definitely doing everything the “wrong” way but I think I’m a fairly happy person and that’s what matters. If others find inspiration in my life then that’s a bonus. But don’t think it’s all glorious. This life choice I made comes with its own slew of problems which I have to deal with…so life will always be there to give you a reality check.

What Really Matters

When people ask me how I do what I do, I always feel cornered. I mean, it’s kind of a weird, personal question to ask someone. If we get to the heart of the matter, I feel what people really want to know is how I created something out of nothing. I think people are fascinated because secretly none of us really want to work for “the man.” So, when we meet someone who is living so unconventionally, it peaks our interests.  But here’s the thing, it isn’t particularly remarkable to me. I simply recognized what I wanted in life and went for it. I made a conscious effort to believe in myself. The strange thing about believing in something is usually others will know it. They’ll feel it and they just might start believing in it too.

Therefore, if you want others to believe in something you’d like to build then it’s necessary that you believe in yourself first. There is no standardized set of steps to living your genuine life and working your dream job. I see tons of people out there offering practical advice, guidelines, and other things for making your dreams come true. While there might be some value to these products, the one thing those guides and other things can’t give you is self-confidence and belief. You have to find those inside yourself. The best way to do this is through introspection and action. We should not waste our time with feeble attempts to prove what we are or that which we are capable. I know that’s easier said than done (even I struggle with constantly trying to prove myself). But the best thing we can do is take action. Do what is good for you and your dreams and goals. 

6 Tips To Maximize Your Providence Pride Experience. My Normal Gay Life Blog
Enjoying some Pride Festivities!
Do This

Instead of trying to prove yourself to everyone around you, just live your life. Be happy. Be positive. Put effort into your dreams because dreams are useless without action. Through your actions people will see you believe in yourself and what you stand for. This is how you’ll find success more effectively. And remember success is subjective. You need to determine what needs to happen and what results you’d like to see that would constitute success for you. Success does not necessarily equate to a dollar amount. It’s not wealth or fame that will inevitably make you feel successful. Just like self-confidence and self-belief, success is inside you.

So, when it comes down to it, the way I acquired my job isn’t really important. What’s important is I believe in myself.

J Harvey

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Thoughts from The Road: Believe in Yourself - My Normal Gay Life

J. Harvey

J Harvey is a travel writer based in North Carolina. With two masters degrees, he decided to forget working a normal 9-5 job and instead create a travel blog focusing on travel for a more inclusive community. He hopes to increase LGBT representation within the travel industry while inspiring others to travel in whatever capacity.

J. Harvey has 139 posts and counting. See all posts by J. Harvey

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